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Kids - questions and answers

Q: What did one eye say to the other ?
A: Just between you and me ... there's something that smells.
Q: Why were the screams coming from the kitchen ?
A: The cook was beating the eggs.
Q: Who were the first people to invent a plane that couldn't fly ?
A: The wrong brothers.
Q: What is the biggest ant?
A: An Elephant
Q: If a rooster laid a brown egg and a white egg, what kind of chicks would hatch?
A: None. Roosters Don't Lay Eggs!
Q: What do you lose every time you stand up?
A: Your Lap!
Q: Where does a blackbird go for a drink?
A: To a crow bar.
Q: What did the Russian call his pet rodent?
A: Comrat.
Q: What's the name of the snake that joined the Canadian police force?
A: Mountie Python.
Q: When do cannibals leave the table?
A: After everyone's eaten.
Q: What is a cannibal's favorite TV show?
A: A Celebrity Roast.
Q: What has 4 legs and one arm?
A: A pit bull leaving a playground.
Q: How do you get down from an elephant?
A: You don't, you get down from a duck.
Q: What is grey and not there.
A: No elephants.
Q: Why are elephants wrinkled?
A: Have you ever tried to iron one?
Q: How do you know if there is an elephant under the bed?
A: Your nose is touching the ceiling.
Q: How do you stop an elephant from charging?
A: Take away his credit card.
Q: Why do elephants have trunks?
A: Because they would look silly with glove compartments.
Q: What do you give a seasick elephant?
A: Lots of room.
Q: What was the elephant doing on the road?
A: Oh, maybe 2 miles per hour.
Q: How to catch a squirrel?
A: Climb the tree and act like a nut.
Q: Where do cows go for lunch?
A: The "calf"-eteria.
Q: What do you get from a pampered cow?
A: Spoiled Milk.
Q: What did the farmer do after he was done milking the first cow?
A: He milked the "udder" one!
Q: A snake and an undertaker wanted to get married. What will they put on their towels?
A: Hiss and hearse!
Q: Why do birds fly south for the winter?
A: Because it's to far to walk.
Q: What's black and white and eats like horse?
A: A zebra.
Q: What is the first thing you should do after a steam roller runs over your foot?
A: Call a toe truck.
Q: Where was Humpty Dumpty last seen?
A: Great Falls.
Q: Why do Eskimos wash their clothes in Tide?
A: Because it is too cold outtide.

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Kids - questions and answers

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